


Fantasy Costco Seaside Resort & Spa

by hana_pouter



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: M/M, Most of the Bureau of Balance make very brief apperances
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-25
Updated: 2017-10-25
Packaged: 2019-01-22 21:51:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,061
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12491632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hana_pouter/pseuds/hana_pouter
Summary: Taako and Kravitz spend some quality time together during a Bureau of Balance reunion trip to the Fantasy Costco Seaside Resort & Spa.





	Fantasy Costco Seaside Resort & Spa

Taako and Kravitz sat together on a towel on a beautiful, sandy beach. Taako was lounging, sunglasses on, using Kravitz as a sort of back rest.

“This is nice,” said Kravitz, rubbing Taako's shoulder and giving him a kiss on the head. “Getting away from work, getting to spend some quiet time with you.”

Taako looked up from his Simply Fantasy Living magazine. “Likewise, my man.” He gave Kravitz a quick kiss.

“You know,” said Taako in a low voice. “I think all these sands and waves are starting to get a little boring. Maybe we could go back to our cabin and--”

“Can I get you boys anything?” Taako was interrupted by an incredibly familiar voice. Garfield, the Deals Warlock himself. “Maybe another cosmo?” he asked.

Taako sighed, sitting up. “No, thank you.”

“Then how about some extra sunscreen?” said Garfield. “Or a sword, maybe? A very large tub of peanut butter, hmmmm? Anything you could possibly want is yours for the purchasing, here at the Fantasy Costco Seaside Resort & Spa.”

“Garfield,” said Taako. “Garfield? Darling? We were kind of in the middle of something.”

“Anything I can help with?”

“God, no, Garfield, I'll give you 5 gold to go away.”

“Deal!” Garfield. As he walked away with his money he chuckled to himself, “Suckers.”

Taako immediately turned around and got up close and personal with Kravitz again. “So, where were we?”

Kravitz stopped him. “Don't you feel a little awkward doing this with all your coworkers around?”

The entire Bureau of Balance was on the beach nearby. Merle was building the largest and most lopsided sandcastle Kravitz had ever seen. Carrey, Killian, Magnus, and Avi were playing a game of beach volleyball. Angus was playing in the water. Lucretia was reading a book a few feet away from them. Johan was playing an acoustic guitar and singing Jimmy Buffet songs. Various other Bureau employees wandered back and forth, enjoying their beach day.

“They're not technically my coworkers anymore,” said Taako, sitting up and wrapping his arms around his knees. “Anyway, it's not like I get a lot of chances to get away from my growing media empire. I thought you'd be happy I invited you along to this BoB reunion.”

“I am happy!” said Kravitz. “I just... wish we did more stuff just for the two of us.”

“Well, I did make sure we got our own cabin, so.”

“No, I mean like.” Kravitz sighed. “Sometimes I feel like I'm just a nice afterthought, you know? Like you only ever include me in things you were going to do anyway.”

“Hey, that's not true,” said Taako, his voice quiet, and a little nervous.

“I know it's not,” said Kravitz. “I'm sorry. I'm being silly. I'm gonna go chase Garfield down and take him up on one of those cosmos. Do you want anything?”

“Whatever's cheapest,” said Taako. “It's all key lime gogurt to me.”

Kravitz kissed Taako and went to go get some drinks for the two of them. When he got back, Taako was fighting a bird.

“Stupid bird!” shouted Taako, grasping and flailing in the middle of a flurry of wing beats and pecks. “Don't make me magic missile you! I will summon a demon to eat your face!'

Kravitz immediately ran over, chasing the bird away. “Oh my god, Taako, are you okay?”

Taako rubbed at the scratches all over his arm. “Yeah, I'm fine. I'm gonna track down that bird and murder its family, though.”

“Why in the world were you fighting that seagull?”

“Uh, for this,” said Taako, held up a small seashell. It was a deep, midnight blue, opalescent and shimmering. Taako was blushing hard. “It's, uh... I saw it and it was all pretty and dark and goth like you like, so I went to pick it up, but then the bird grabbed it at the same time.”

“Aww, Taako,” said Kravitz. “That's really sweet, actually. I'd love to have the shell.”

“No, you can't have it, it's stupid.” Taako turned and hurled the shell as hard as he could into the sea. “I don't even care about shells or birds. What alcohol did you bring me?”

Kravitz looked down, realizing he had dropped the drinks further back on the beach. "I, uh, I guess I dropped them when I saw your bird situation."

"Aww, man," said Taako. "Well, let's go get some more."

Kravitz followed Taako, occasionally glancing over his back towards the ocean, where Taako had tossed the shell.

 

#

 

Later that night, Kravitz and Taako stumbled into their room, laughing and talking.

“So then I said to Johan,” said Taako. “'Anyway, here's Wonderwall' and then I took the concertina, and I--”

Taako stopped in his tracks.

“Taako, what is it?” asked Kravitz.

Taako pointed at the small side table in the doorway of the room. There was a small opalescent seashell on the table. “Is that--?”

“Oh, man,” said Kravitz. Now it was his turn to blush. “Well, while you were gone with other Bureau employees this afternoon, I went back to the beach, and I called the Raven Queen, and she called Isthus, and I asked her to rewrite time just a little bit for me so that the shell was back on the beach.”

“You asked a goddess to rewrite time for this?” asked Taako. “You like this shell that much? Honey, you are getting shells for every holiday from now on.”

“It's not the shell, Taako.” Kravitz took Taako's hand, and drew him closer, speaking quietly. “It's the fact that you saw it and you thought of me. It's the fact that you fought a bird for it. It's the fact that you were too shy to give it to me. It's the small things like that that make me know you really do care about me, and that your feelings are real. It's not the shell that I love, Taako. It's you.”

They kissed.

“Still, every gift you're getting is a shell from now on,” said Taako, breaking away.

“Please don't,” said Kravitz.

“It's too late,” said Taako, throwing up his hands in a 'there's nothing I can do' gesture. “You've set a romantic precedent.”

“Please, Taako.”

“But I promise next time I'll take you to a beach that's not run by the Deals Warlock.”

“Oh, thank god,” said Kravitz, following Taako further into their room.

 

 


End file.
